Usually, when I start talking about feedback, folks envision the evaluative feedback they receive or deliver. You know, stuff like annual reviews or the frustrated "This is full of typos, please be more careful," fired off in quick emails. However, the science on feedback tells us that there are three types of feedback: evaluation, coaching, … Continue reading Appreciation as Feedback
The Compliment Sandwich is Terrible
Conventional wisdom has always advocated giving difficult feedback in the form of a 'compliment sandwich.' Here's why you shouldn't do that.
My Rejection Wish List
Oh, you don't have one? Huh. Guess that's just me, then. Well, here's hoping that you don't have a Rejection Wish List for the simple reason that you haven't been rejected much. I, on the other hand, know exactly what I would ask of the Rejection Genie. I would like for people to do the … Continue reading My Rejection Wish List
I said what I said (I mean, I typed what I typed.)
You created, what seems to you, like a foolproof set of directions. And yet.. "Can you show me how to do this again?" "I can't remember how to do it. Will you walk me through it one more time?" (Which, for the record, are good ways to ask for clarification.) Or, the absolute worst: "I … Continue reading I said what I said (I mean, I typed what I typed.)
Just a little Perspective
What to try when your co-workers can't see the forrest for the trees.
On-boarding, like a boss
How to roll out the welcome wagon without losing your mind.
Feedback: Part 3 – Relationships
Our relationships with those who are giving us feedback are, obviously, an important factor in how we receive the feedback they give us. Thus, Stone and Heen's second "trigger" in their book, Thanks for the Feedback, is the "truth trigger." Here, I'll cover the two big pitfalls of feedback conversations caused by relationship triggers: switchtracking and the blame game. Switchtracking … Continue reading Feedback: Part 3 – Relationships
Yes, you really can say, “No” at work. Here’s how.
Say "No" when you notice that the same important task you've been putting at the top of your daily to-do list is still there.. four days later.
It’s Aubrey. With a B.
This rant is for those who get called all sort of names... that aren't theirs.
Don’t make me go back!
OK, so I'm not actually yelling like a toddler, but today is the last day of my 10 day vacation and I'm sad. Those geniuses over at The Muse emailed me this article today with six coping mechanisms for the first day back at work. My two favorites were to make a plan (the must-do list) … Continue reading Don’t make me go back!
Ban busy
You know how some people feel about the word moist? I feel that way about the word busy. I hate the word and yet, I am guilty of using it all the time. "How are you?" "Busy. Busy, but good." That's awful. I just told my friend exactly nothing about what's going on in my life, … Continue reading Ban busy
Feedback: Part 2 – The Truth
See Feedback: Part I for a breakdown of Thanks for the Feedback by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen. They outline three types of feedback (evaluation, coaching, and appreciation) and three "triggers" that make feedback hard to take (truth triggers, relationship triggers, and identity triggers). I'm going to cover Truth Triggers here; what they are, how to avoid it, … Continue reading Feedback: Part 2 – The Truth
According to Aubs 